Everyone's a Critic
by Abel Quartz
Summary: Connie and Steven discover the joys of reading with the brand-new prequel to the Unfamiliar Familiar book series! But when something troubles Connie about the book, Steven has to parse out his own heart with his desire for a happy ending.


Driving around Beach City was your average east coast tour experience, as far as anyone could tell. Souvenir shops selling various state logos sat next to junk food stops, staying in business with marked-up batteries and bottled water. Rustic historical sites made for pleasant photographs for tourists and locals alike. In the drive-thru, there was a line of cars waiting for food and drink, and, ahead of them, was your average pink lion.

Steven passed a bill through the window to the shaking attendant.

"Thank you!"

"Uh-huh."

They ducked back into the restaurant as Lion sauntered up to the next window. Behind Steven, Connie hung on nervously.

"Are you sure this is legal?" she asked.

"Why wouldn't it be? You don't need a license to drive a Lion. Besides, he's practically driving us! Aren't you, Lion?"

"Steven, he skipped at least two cars in front of us and roared at them when they honked."

That was a good point. Steven opened his mouth to defend Lion's charismatic character when the window opened. Another attendant, equally confused, pinched the very edge of the bag as he held it through the only gap between him and the massive predator.

"T-two sundaes and a Load-o-Burger?"

Lion's teeth closed around the top of the bag, and the three of them trotted away to the sidewalk. Steven lifted the bag gingerly from Lion's mouth, passing one of the sundaes back to Connie, taking one for himself, and unwrapping the burger before tossing it in front of them. Before it had even begun its arc down, Lion had snapped it out of the air, swallowing it in a single bite.

"See, Connie?" Steven said. "He's a luxurious ride and a good friend, too!"

"Like your own familiar!"

"Maybe. But Lion's too independent. He's got an iron will."

Lion snorted.

A couple people stared, but half the town had already seen Lion and was almost used to the strange boy and his companions. One stranger took a picture of the pair of them riding on the beast; Steven smiled and waved, and Connie turned her face away with a mouthful of ice cream.

"Where do y'wanna go now, Connie?" he asked as they turned down Main Street.

She swallowed, stirring the slurry with her spoon in thought.

"Well, we could always go back to the library after we finish our food, or we could run down to the bookstore. Mom wants me back for dinner but that's not going to be for a few hours. Maybe we could go down to the barn! I can pick up my violin, and then Peridot and Lapis can –"

She noticed that Steven was half-listening, staring across the street. Connie turned, and her surprise at the display turned into concerned unease.

Crossing over, Lion sat down on the sidewalk as Steven pressed his hands against the glass of the bookstore's display. The cardboard logo cutout was almost as big as him, Archimicarus mid-transformation, wings spread and human face stoic and strong. The stack of books next to his figure were all shiny hardcovers, brand-new.

"'A collaborative prequel to _Unfamiliar Familiar_ and the Spirit Morph Saga,'" Steven read, "' _The Eyes Behind the Mirror_!?' Connie, have you seen this?"

Connie rubbed the back of her head and averted her eyes. Steven took a step back immediately, biting his tongue attentively.

"Well…I read the reviews, and I'm not sure," she said after a second.

"Were they bad? Is it one of _those_ books?"

Connie sighed. "Not quite. Just some critiques. I'm sure it's fine. I can take it or leave it, really. I've had a good run with the Spirit Morph Saga."

Her eyes shot up as she felt Steven grab her hands, pulling them gently into his. He was smiling nervously, in one of those moments where he was unsure of what to say, putting thought and heart into a sentence that he was crafting just for her.

"Why don't we read it together," he said, "like our own little book club? And we can talk about it over snacks and be all literary and stuff?"

"Heh. Only for you, Steven."

The pause gave them enough of an awkward moment to make eye contact before they broke into grins, giggling as they strolled into the bookstore. Lion watched them knowingly until the door shut, whereupon he laid in the middle of the sidewalk, taking in some of the sun while he could have a moment to rest.

Steven and Connie were riding up the porch not a half-hour later, with Steven hefting the bag bulging with two fresh hardcover novels. The cover was slightly more stylized than the previous iterations of the series, with swirling gold font that shone as if gilded. Archimicarus, as a human, was staring at a translucent silver sphere he was holding in his hands, with the faint outline of a stranger in the orb.

"What do you think happens? Wait, no, you read the reviews – were there spoilers? Why is Archimicarus a human here? I thought he was always her familiar. Or! Or maybe he was someone else's, and he…I mean…"

Connie had already opened up the front cover, reading the jacket as she sat cross-legged on the couch. She glanced up when Steven stopped talking, catching him in the act of staring. He reddened and opened up the fridge, clumsily rummaging for ingredients.

"I'll make us something," he mumbled into the condiments.

Connie was glad he was turned around. It gave him a moment to compose himself, and it gave her a second for her own blush to fade back into her cheeks.

The warp pad burst in a column of light, and Amethyst jumped through, surprisingly unaccompanied. Steven had known they were going to investigate some ruins today, but only one Gem returning made his stomach turn. Thankfully, Amethyst was grinning, although her outfit was covered in dust and scrapes. Her whip trailed behind her, the jeweled spurs clattering on the floor.

"Steven! You gotta see this," she yelled, running towards him. Steven yipped as she hefted him off the ground. "There's like – there's the things, and they're like, and also we need your help because there's a lot of them but you GOTTA get in on this!"

"Wait! No, Connie and I were going to –"

Amethyst was already running towards the warp pad. Connie jumped up, but this was something that Steven needed to do with the Gems, and besides, she had some reading to do.

"We'll be back soon!" Amethyst winked at Connie as the pad began to light up.

"Don't read too much without meeee!" Steven cried as the light began to consume him.

"No promises!"

Connie smirked and opened the book to the first page. Lion jumped up next to her and nuzzled into her arm. She leaned against the massive cat, feeling the magical warmth from inside his mane. The afternoon sky passed by outdoors, and Steven's book waited for him by Connie's side, untouched and unknown.

The sun was starting to droop behind the cloud cover when the warp pad shimmered, and the four Gems came back to the house. Garnet, Amethyst and Pearl were worse for wear, but trudged down stoically regardless.

"We're going to need to rest up after that one," Pearl said to Steven. "You and Connie can do your reading while we recuperate."

"Aye aye!"

Steven had scratches all over his arms and a couple on his face, but he was smiling still as they jumped down from the platform. This was one adventure he needed to relate to Connie, and he ran back into the living room to tell her everything. The Gems retreated to their respective rooms to clean, calm, and collect themselves. Odors of burnt feathers and grass stains dissipated through the house as he took a deep breath in preparation for his tale.

Lion had moved to his bed, clearly bored, and Connie was in the same position as where she had started, three-quarters of the novel behind her left thumb, sticky notes marked throughout the pages. There were creases underneath her eyes as she looked up to Steven, her lips tight and her knuckles taut. Steven stopped smiling. He cleared his throat.

"So, um, how is it?"

"It's got some issues."

Steven chuckled, hands on his hips. "That bad, huh?"

Connie wasn't smiling. She took the book's flap and marked the page, closing it and squeezing the pages together. Steven lifted one arm, as if in preparation to ask a question, or to reach for her arm.

"I'm going home," she muttered, standing and shaking her sore muscles. "Talk to you later, Steven."

"Wait, wait wait!"

Steven ran forwards, hands held out. He didn't block her path, but he was tempted to. Connie made eye contact with him, and her stony gaze softened immediately. Despite her reservations, it was inevitable that for as long as she was pained, Steven would be pained too.

"Did we take too long? I'm sorry, there was just so much, and I should have invited you, but Amethyst just dragged me in and I didn't have a second," he rambled as they sat back down on the couch. "I really want to read this with you, and I can read really fast if you want so we can be at the same place! Do you want anything to eat? I can…do…something? Connie, what's wrong?"

He reached for the novel, but Connie stayed his hand, her fingers only brushing over his wrist – but that was enough to make him freeze and listen.

"Steven, I don't want to read this book anymore," she said. "I don't think we should."

He couldn't help but give a weak smile. "Is it that bad?"

"Kind of." She sighed, flipping through the pages. "It's written just as skillfully, and the same author made the world, but there's some things inside – well, I mean, are spoilers okay at this point?"

"It pains me, but yes, that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make for you."

Connie flipped to a specific note, bringing the book between their laps.

"See, you were right about Archimicarus being human, sort of. The whole book, they explain all about the familiar world before they come to their humans, how they watch and learn about them so that they can be good familiars for their witches. But in this story, Archimicarus is watching Lisa and he decides that he's going to guide her from the familiar's realm, which is against all the rules that the familiars live by."

"But why does he do it?" Steven asked. "Is it because she has some kind of destiny, something that he sees happening to them? An adventure?"

"Well, no. It's because the moment he sees her, he knows that one day they'll fall in love," Connie said.

She didn't even have to look to see Steven's reaction. The sappiness went straight through to his heart, and he was listening attentively, eyes fixed on the page as he heaved a gentle sigh. When he looked up, though, he knew that there was more to it than that. They didn't agree on everything, but they could at least understand the other's tastes. Connie was clearly uncomfortable in a way that almost made Steven queasy. Still, nothing was going to happen without conversation.

"So, what's wrong with that?" he said. "They do fall in love, don't they? And get married and all that?"

"But Lisa never had a choice! Everything that happened to her was so that Archimicarus could guide her into being ready to fell in love with him!"

Connie grabbed the book back, flipping through passages fervently.

"See, here," she said, "from the very beginning, it's love at first sight – from his sight – and not only does it ret-con all of his motivations to be romantic, but Lisa is helpless without him. The only reason that she's able to do anything is because Archimicarus is helping her, and the only reason that he's helping her is because he wants to marry her!"

"That can't be the only reason, though! And even if it was – well, isn't that enough? Sometimes we don't get a choice," Steven said. "Sometimes it's destiny."

Connie slammed the book shut, jumping up from the couch and pacing back and forth in front of the table. Steven gripped the cushions as if preparing for a gust. From the loft above, Lion watched curiously, giving a puff of air out of his nose, resting his face on the ledge with his paws dangling over the edge.

"This isn't destiny! This was the writers taking this character, and stripping her of all her agency, all of her power," Connie shouted, "and turning her into a love object! Even at _Destiny's End_ , Lisa still knew what she was doing. Here, she's just – like, her only purpose is to be something for Archimicarus. Not even someONE, someTHING. A prop! Don't you see how atrocious that is, Steven?"

Steven grabbed the book and bit his lip. There was something off about what Connie was saying, but she was still clearly upset. He skimmed some of the pages where she had marked notes, but his eyes weren't able to focus on the words on the page with all the thoughts that came through his head.

"Connie, don't you think…" he started, measuring his words. "…isn't it possible that you're exaggerating, just a little?"

Stopping in her tracks, Connie crossed her arms over her chest and glared down at Steven. Perhaps that was the wrong thing to say, but Steven still met her glare with defiance. It felt good to be a little angry here.

"Steven, don't you think it's just a little bit weird that a mature adult man is looking at a child and thinking of marrying her?"

That did it. Steven's opposing stare faltered, and he looked back down at the book. All the thoughts of love and romance faded as he felt Connie's anger. It wasn't at him, and it wasn't at the book, and he felt ashamed that it had taken him this long to get it from her point of view. And she was still irked as well. He didn't look up again as Connie relaxed her muscles, coming to sit back down next to him.

Her hands clasped together, fingers tapping tips. "Archimicarus makes choices, for her. He manifests the man with one eye. He gives her specific mysterious powers. He ruins Lisa's life because he wants her all for himself, and he has that power, and he uses it in the name of what he calls love. Is that love? To skew someone's perceptions so much that you become their only option?"

Steven didn't respond. It was Connie's time to talk, and his time to listen. He didn't want to look at her now in case she thought he had something to say over her.

"I know it wasn't the author's original intention, I don't think," Connie continued, "but he's complicit in this. I know I'm being heavy-handed, but I think this is important. I think it's better to read the series without this. Yeah, there's story, but some other girl's going to read this and maybe think that it's okay. I'd feel responsible for that if I didn't say something. It's nobody's fault but the authors', but still."

"Maybe you should go home."

Connie hadn't expected that. She looked back up and saw Steven turned away, his head hunched and his arms resting on his knees. The girl reached over underneath his chin, turning Steven to face her. A tear dripped down over her thumb.

"Steven?"

He reached up with both hands to pull hers down, breaking eye contact.

"Steven, what's wrong?"

But he shook his head and kept staring at the cushions. This time, Connie's fingers pressed into his skin, one hand on either one of his cheeks as she forced him to face her. He closed his eyes, squeezing another set of tears out onto her hands.

"I don't want to look at you!" he shouted. "I don't want to make you feel like that, not ever again!"

"Wait…" Connie said as she let her hands down, adjusting her seat. "Steven, I don't understand. You don't look at me like – "

Then she realized. She glanced from Archimicarus's steely gaze on the cover to Steven's swollen eyelids, her stomach turning as she realized what he was trying to say. His weathered breathing slowed as Connie slid closer, putting her hand over Steven's shoulder.

"Do you… Well, when you look at me, do you feel things like that, Steven?" she asked.

Neither one of them knew exactly what 'that' was, but there was a clear connection between the book and their friendship that Steven felt. He sniffled, shaking his head.

"Not like that. Never like that. I never want to make you feel that you don't have a choice. I know how that feels, and I hate it, and even if I didn't know about it I wouldn't want to have that feeling. And I wouldn't want anyone to be my friend if they felt that I was taking choice away from them."

"But you don't! You know that I have a choice," Connie said, grabbing the hand that rested in the boy's lap, a small smile returning to her lips. "Don't you think I would have told you if I had a problem with anything? Then we could fix it, together!"

"So…is it okay? When I look at you like…"

Steven glanced up, and even though he wasn't trying, she knew that it was there again. Connie felt the future in his eyes, a kind of special hope for the both of them. She saw it every time they were done with training, every morning after a sleepover when he had to go home, each time he smiled as she tuned her violin. It was like hope, but something a little bit closer; it was the hope of her, an upcoming chapter with both of them together, co-authored and collaborated.

She locked eyes with him and felt his gaze grow stronger, revitalized and, in this moment, reflected.

"I-I can't say I haven't looked at you the same way," she said.

They realized that their hands were together again, and Connie squeezed his fingers, rubbing her thumb over the arch of his stout knuckles. Their legs pushed together as they shifted. Steven's toes curled up against the floor of his sandals.

A loud growl interrupted them, and they whipped their heads around to see Lion snorting down at them. Stretching his rump, the cat flexed his claws and stood, glad for this conflict to be resolved.

"Think he's hungry?"

Steven nodded and chuckled, getting up and tossing the book onto the coffee table.

"I think so. I need something, too. Why don't I fix us up that snack?"

Connie smiled at him.

"I'd like that."

Steven came over to the refrigerator and opened it up. He could hear Connie behind him, putting the books back into the bag. Lion's footsteps started to come back down the stairs to join them. It was time to create something, something for everyone to enjoy. Steven grabbed the ingredients, ready to start.


End file.
